Dreamland!

The mirtazipine I take for sleep usually makes me have bizarre crazy dreams.  It seems that every night is a new adventure and I wake up feeling bad.  Last night I actually had a sweet dream though.  It was still disjointed and didn't make a whole lot of sense but I dreamed that Keith and I were engaged again.  What was so sweet about it was that I felt that I was accepting him for who he was and not trying to change him in any way and I was equally accepted.  In looking back at my relationships, I've never been as accepting as I could have been.  I've had some bad luck in relationships - well, I've chosen poorly!  I wish I had been in the place emotionally that I'm in now.  More accepting of myself and of others.  Life might have been very different for me.  But I'm not going to spend time focused on the "what ifs" because I am still very happy and content and I realize how very blessed I am.  There are a few of my former "beaus" that I remember in prayer and ask God to bless them in their lives and relationships.  I don't wish for soemthing different for them because that would mean wishing that the children they have didn't exist.  I won't wish that blessing away for them!